The First Annual Golden Outfitters Awards

Remember when Sylvester Stalone whipped out the bolt gun in Cliffhanger? Remember Kevin Bacon's and Sean Astin's ride down a never ending slew of Class V rapids in "White Water Summer," literally without a paddle? Remember the banjo playin' from "Deliverance's" ride down the Chattooga? Remember every single cringe inducing moment from Chris O'Donnell's 2000 opus "Vertical Limit?"

As outdoor enthusiasts, these are the moments in cinema we love to hate. These are the movies that make everyone else say, "Wow, (insert outdoor activity here) is really cool. I can't believe that (insert random Hollywood star here) is sooo hardcore!"

Numerous stars have been made into immortal outdoor gods with the help of movie magic. "Mr. and Mrs. Smith" made Angelina Jolie the first woman to free the Nose...in under an hour...with a skeleton rack of singles...and a piton hammer. And "The River Wild" showed us that Meryl Streep can be an Olympic rower and death defying (or inducing in this case) rafting guide.

To truely honor these movies, so unjustly overlooked by the Academy, we present the Oscar of Outfitters, the High Country Golden Paddle, Boot, and Biner! Given to the most unrealistic representation of an outdoor activity in the categories of Paddling, Hiking, and Climbing.

Without further ado, we present to you the winners of the Golden Outfitters Awards-

In the category of Climbing, the winner is: "Vertical Limit"

Runner up: "Cliffhanger"

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In the category of Paddling the winner is: "White Water Summer"

Runner up:"The River Wild"

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In the category of Hiking the winner is: ....does anyone know of a hiking movie at all?
1st runner up: "The Edge"

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In honor of the first annual Golden Outfitters Awards Tom Cruise will be coming in to the store soon to teach a climbing clinic focusing on the "downward dyno" and "chossy multipitch soloing." Space is limited so sign up soon!*

*Just kidding, there is no clinic with Tom Cruise, this is not to be taken seriously, and neither are you if you actually want to learn climbing from Tom Cruise.